Sunday, March 22, 2009


Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator and Dr. Mrs. The Monarch.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Thank you.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: I wasn’t sure if I’d see you here tonight, Dr. Mrs. The Monarch, but I had a hench that I would.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Wow, that was awful.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Yeah, I was just following the TelePrompTer. It’s good to see you though, and hear your voice in person.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: What about my voice?

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Well nothing, it’s husky you know. You sound kind of like Kathleen Turner on steroids.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: What about your voice? You sound like a squeak toy with some kind of nasal problem.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Hey!

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Good thing you’re an Intergalactic Gladiator, whatever that is. Your voice definitely isn’t cut out for broadcasting.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Alright alright, let’s just get back to the script.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Merriam-Webster’s defines a henchman as a trusted follower: a right-hand man, a political follower whose support is chiefly for personal advantage, or a member of a gang.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator: Whether the boss needs a new hideout built into a volcano, his sworn enemy exterminated, or when he’s just jonesing for a double bean burrito from the local Taco Mat, the henchman is the trusted lackey who he turns to.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Unfortunately, the life of a henchman is a dangerous one. They face high technology weapons, cunning adversaries, and occasionally the wrath of their boss.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: At this time, it is our privilege to remember those from the Union who have fallen in the past year.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Thank you.

5 comments:

Henchman432 said...

Brilliant.

Vegeta said...

So many mamories of killing them. Ah good times.

Vegeta said...

i meant memories damn freuadian slip

Mr. Bennet said...

Where's Tony Snow?

captain koma said...

Thats cool as.

Now what happens next in an awards cermony.

Oh yeah the actual giving of the awards.

Hmmmm....