Ladies and Gentlemen, Mr. Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator and Dr. Mrs. The Monarch.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Thank you.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: I wasn’t sure if I’d see you here tonight, Dr. Mrs. The Monarch, but I had a hench that I would.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Wow, that was awful.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Yeah, I was just following the TelePrompTer. It’s good to see you though, and hear your voice in person.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: What about my voice?

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Well nothing, it’s husky you know. You sound kind of like Kathleen Turner on steroids.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: What about your voice? You sound like a squeak toy with some kind of nasal problem.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Hey!

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Good thing you’re an Intergalactic Gladiator, whatever that is. Your voice definitely isn’t cut out for broadcasting.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: Alright alright, let’s just get back to the script.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Merriam-Webster’s defines a henchman as a trusted follower: a right-hand man, a political follower whose support is chiefly for personal advantage, or a member of a gang.

Jon the Intergalactic Gladiator: Whether the boss needs a new hideout built into a volcano, his sworn enemy exterminated, or when he’s just jonesing for a double bean burrito from the local Taco Mat, the henchman is the trusted lackey who he turns to.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Unfortunately, the life of a henchman is a dangerous one. They face high technology weapons, cunning adversaries, and occasionally the wrath of their boss.

Jon The Intergalactic Gladiator: At this time, it is our privilege to remember those from the Union who have fallen in the past year.

Dr. Mrs. The Monarch: Thank you.